Yeah, I’m still alive. Technically. Have turned into a robot with a very bossy Ipod though. My main delusion is that music is full of messages telling me what to do at any given time. I also run a lot on what used to be called ‘feminine intuition’.
This afternon R my partner and I are driving down to Harlow in Essex for a meeting with social workers, my son and his foster mum. It’s called a Looked After Child meeting and they happen about every six months. It’s to discuss how he’s doing in his care placement. His education, health, need for therapy or not, stuff like that.
I sometimes feel like I am juming between different worlds at the moment. On Sunday a Buddhist retreat (and the rejection of someone I mistakenly thought was Mr Right! Dang! Wrong again!
Now I have to jump from the loony bin to the office of a fostering agency and try to look vaguely like a very concerned and involved mum. Which of course, I am. But multi-tasking on this level is no easy thing believe me. Focus , persistence, clarity and determination are the main qualities I have to drag out of my inner being. Otherwise I would be frankly dribbling and babbling with the best of them.
One thing I have noticed. When the shrink asks these days about my mood (yeah, that dreaded question, ‘how is your mood’) I am at a complete loss for words!
And as less is generally the new more (hence the credit crunch) I will leave it there as to the latest news. Don’t want to incriminate myself further in any case. Paranoia levels running high, but not sure that counts as a mood Ms Shrink.
I’d rather read and hear from all of you in any case so keep those comments coming folks! Share the love and all that, but special thanx to all my real friends both on the Madosphere and in real life who are with me (almost) every step of the way. Keep the faith.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx