Some people like to indulge themselves in other people’s suffering because they clearly have done so little of their own.
The ‘help’ they offer will always be inadequate and incomplete, very often causing more problems than it solves.
We are truly living in the age of the wounded healer. If you yourself have been where I am? I’m interested in hearing from you, will listen respectfully. Otherwise yanno what? Leave well alone.
Literally no one has or ever will be able to walk in my shoes in any meaningful sense. So I have no friends and that is not a lament, just a statement of cold hard facts. To be someone’s friend for me equates to being used and possibly drained of whatever I can offer them. It’s emphatically not a two-way street. This knowledge is more liberating to me than it is sobering.
If I need a sounding board I have the two guys I live with and together they bear more effective witness than anyone else ever has with the possible exception of my son. So I’m already a lot better off than I was.
We create our own worlds, our own realities. In this we are indeed co-creators with the Divine. If the eye offends thee, pluck it out is an Old Testament saying that appears somewhat extreme but nevertheless carries the harsh truth that we are responsible for our own lives.
Quit with the misery porn, the addiction to hand-wringing. It rings so hollow! Search your own motives unrelentingly. Looking within, knowing and respecting your own humanity in its entirety is the key to beginning to create the circumstances you desire.