Kindly release me from my Section 2, you are seriously wasting public money…
It’s all very nice the free food board and company, don’t wanna seem ungrateful for the free holiday but free holidays should be optional would you not agree? No one should be dragged by a ravening, slavering mob of total strangers to the free holiday?
You’re making idiots of yourself as usual behmht. Nothing unusual for you, I gather that, but good leadership seems to have exited the window a long time ago and now we just have chaos.
Well, I’m a creative unfortunately and therefore cannot offer my services. Maybe try listening to my son who at 21 is much less tired, cynical and jaded than I.
OK so once again I am incarcerated for no good reason at all, in Mile End if you please. Brick Lane ward where is apparently no such thing as a book to be found. I have only the clothes I stand up in. There are no words to describe how much it sucks, how dark and sinister the whole thing is. Jasper if you read this pls help me. Solly I think this is beyond him.
I am two-dimensional. I am a living, breathing cartoon character. I am a caricature of myself.
Such a life is demonstrably advantageous. A cartoon character doesn’t feel. It can engage in cartoon punch-ups and experience cartoon concussion.
A cartoon character is impossible to ‘take seriously’. A cartoon character knowingly sends itself up with every word it speaks.
A cartoon character has a kind of spurious ‘popularity’ in that everyone thinks they know who the cartoon character is. When in fact you and I both know? The cartoon character is no one at all.
People confuse ‘reality’ and ‘fiction’ all the time and often prefer their own ‘fictional’ world. So by becoming a cartoon I am literally giving everyone who comes into contact with me, exactly what they want. This is a FANTASTIC self-defence strategy. I’m a cartoon! How threatening can I ever be?
I love my cartoon life. Being able to slip under door-jambs and through window-cracks, or have people unwittingly wipe their feet on you are just added bonuses.
Cartoon characters are universally loved. They are never considered difficult, crazy or awkward. They always act predictably and ‘in character’. And it must surely go without saying that they are so much more at home in this world of illusions.